LONE-LINESS vs ALONE-NESS
I remember my father singing a song, I think it was reminiscence of the time he spent in North Africa during WWII, the words, as I remember them were “Lonely as a desert breeze, I may wander where I please…” As the memory emerged so I began thinking of loneliness, and how different it is to aloneness.
There is a sadness, a longing, an emptiness hidden in the word loneliness. Think of the widow in her home, children married with families of their own. The funeral is over, and she is alone after all have left, she washes the dishes, vacuums the house, makes a cup of tea and the silence descends…she is alone.
A man is sent to a remote area to complete a work contract. He works hard all day then the siren goes indicating for them to “down tools”. Many co-workers head off to a nearby bar, but he has had his brush with alcoholism and cannot put himself to the test. Too tired to do anything constructive, but not tired enough to sleep…loneliness!
A child sits alone on the playground of the new school. Children all around are playing games with their friends, they have been in the same school, the same town, forever. Loneliness!
I also think of Jesus in the Garden of Gethsemane. He is alone and wrestling with the knowledge of the suffering that He will have to endure… and the sadness of the ‘brokenness’ and weakness of so many people. He weeps for them…. Those closest to Him cannot understand, cannot comfort Him!
However, there is a vast difference between ‘loneliness’ and ‘alone-ness’.
Alone-ness has a totally different ambiance, meaning, experience! We need to have “alone” time. Some writers rent remote accommodation so that they can fully focus on the thoughts that they are trying to convert into words. When we are alone with only ourselves, no-one to prevent or interrupt our inner journey, then the real ‘soul’ work begins. The Psalmist speaks to himself and says, “Why are you downcast, O my soul?” A time to acknowledge our thoughts and feelings, away from well-meaning friends and loved ones who would offer solutions or encouragement. A time to actually feel … to rejoice, to mourn, to be proud, to admit failure, to be angry and to explore why that emotion is so strong, to be able to think, plan and dream.
Jesus, John the Baptist, and many spiritual giants and guru’s have spent time in the ‘desert’ or in quiet spots in mountains etc. It seems to be that in that silence, clarity is easier to come by. Think of the opposite-the noise of a busy city, town, environment. It is not easy to think and feel deeply in those places.
We may not be able to escape to the desert, or such like places, but we can proactively create such a place for ourselves.
Loneliness is a cry for love and companionship
Aloneness is a time for inner rejuvenation
